is even more fun than going to San Sebastian, Irún, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne or being sick to my stomach on the Travesera de Gracia in Barcelona partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian partly because of my love for you, partly because of your love for yoghurt partly because of the fluorescent orange tulips around the birches partly because of the secrecy our smiles take on before people and statuary it is hard to believe when I’m with you that there can be anything as still as solemn as unpleasantly definitive as statuary when right in front of it in the warm New York 4 o’clock light we are drifting back and forth between each other like a tree breathing through its spectacles
and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them
I look at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world except possibly for the Polish Rider occasionally and anyway it’s in the Frick which thank heavens you haven’t gone to yet so we can go together the first time and the fact that you move so beautifully more or less takes care of Futurism just as at home I never think of the Nude Descending a Staircase or at a rehearsal a single drawing of Leonardo or Michelangelo that used to wow me and what good does all the research of the Impressionists do them when they never got the right person to stand near the tree when the sun sank or for that matter Marino Marini when he didn’t pick the rider as carefully as the horse
it seems they were all cheated of some marvelous experience which is not going to go wasted on me which is why I am telling you about it
Pep Talk: You bring so much joy into the lives of others; you owe it to yourself to be happy. If you’re unhappy now, consider this time-honored technique for feeling better:
Can you change or remove the thing that’s making you unhappy? If so, do it. If not, accept it and stop thinking about it.
(It’s times like these that I wish I had a flowchart.)
Much of your mood is up to you and, while it may sound oversimple, deciding to be happy often works. Refuse to let another person’s mood dictate your own. Take some responsibility for your attitude and outlook. You’re an incredibly fortunate person who deserves to feel great, so either make a change or make peace with the present.
Today remind yourself: You’re responsible for your happiness.
brb. listening to the newsies soundtrack to get through the rest of today.
edit: holy crap i still know all the words. edit above statement to: making the office awesome by singing newsies to everyone who walks past me and when i go to the copier i will throw papers in the air and break into awesome breakdancing and sing about striking and carrying the banner and freeing Crutchie! ((all of this is happening in my head obvi. i ain’t gettin fired today)).
sitting at your desk and thinking you hear someones voice who you want to see really terribly bad. best feeling ever.
that sinking feeling when you realize that there is no way they would be in your office, that is 1,000 miles away from where they actually are. and then turning around to see that you are, in fact, wrong. that it’s just another person in the hallway. worst feeling ever.